As a military officer and leader, there have been many instances where I have received questions concerning how to make hard decisions. I have often been asked, “what was your thought process, what guided your decision?” And even questions like “how do you trust and have confidence in the decisions you make?” and “do you think you made the right call?”

Well, the reality is that most decisions affecting military leaders today, from the lowest to the highest level of leadership, are not easy. Period. Any decision that lingers, and subsequently moves up the chain, is probably a hard decision in search of someone willing to make the final call. Every growing and developing leader must find a way to learn to make hard decisions. Frankly it isn’t really the decision-making itself that intimidates folks, but the anticipated aftermath of doubt. In actuality, the true key to decision-making is learning to trust and be at peace with the thought process that one employs.

This, “learning to be at peace,” with one’s decisions -- is critical. Most leaders will employ a multitude of facets to shape and influence a decision. A few examples are: experience, intelligence/skill, advisement, opinions, instinct, and common sense. All of these are important. For me, there has always been one additional and foundational concept I have always applied when I’m making a tough decision. It is something my father told me the day I was commissioned as an officer in the USAF, and that is, ”do whatever you can to be as fair as possible, in the decisions you make for your people, and that means all the people, not just one or two.”

You are probably thinking to yourself, really, “being fair” – that’s the wise methodology I’m using to help in making hard decisions? It seems pretty naïve, juvenile, and not all that helpful, right? But, stick with me, there is great wisdom in this very simplistic advice.

Throughout the course of history, blatant “unfairness” is arguably the single most powerful catalyst for antagonizing an individual/group and calling them into action. Fairness stems from the very root of our country’s development in the belief that all people are created equal and everyone deserves equal opportunity and processes. In the words of Abraham Lincoln, “These men ask for just the same thing, fairness, and fairness only.”

As a leader’s judgment develops under the blanket of fairness, so does the cultivation of a multitude of other invaluable and priceless leadership traits. Fairness actually transcends into impartiality, rationality, objectivity, open mindedness, and unselfish behavior. Being impartial and objective doesn’t necessarily mean having no biases -- rather it means knowing yourself and the situation enough to identify biases and furthermore finding a way to gather perspectives that can help you set your personal biases aside. As Wes Fessler has said, “Fairness is man’s ability to rise above his own prejudices.” Being able to rise out of your own pre-conceived notion and judgment is critical to making sound decisions that one can not only defend time and time again, but that one can find peace in accepting; thus freeing the leader of regret so he or she can move on to the next hurdle and decision.

Of course, as a “realistic” leader I know that not all situations are truly fair; moreover, I also know that unfairness is unavoidable in our complex, and sometimes cruel, world. And of course, one should never assume that every decision made will be perfectly right. However, the simple act of analyzing a situation with fairness in mind, gives one the ability to ensure all aspects and subsequent consequences/outcomes have been reviewed and considered in the pursuit for the “best” decision. I challenge each of you to try it, and see what you think!

I close with these words from President Dwight Eisenhower, “Though force can protect in emergency, only justice, fairness, consideration and cooperation can finally lead men to the dawn of eternal peace.”