What I've learned

SOUTHWEST ASIA -- In the words of one of the four expeditionary group commanders at the 379th Air Expeditionary Wing, the commanders were "issued friends" when they got here. That's why, for the four of them and, really, for the rest of the base, it's great they like each other. Though their jobs and personalities are distinctly different, Colonels John Kubinec (Maintenance Group); Rachel Lefebvre (Medical Group); Kory Auch (Mission Support Group); and Chris Kulas (Operations Group) are strikingly similar.


I sat down with each of them separately, though I joked at times their answers were so comparable, we could have done all the interviews together. They all said the people they've worked for, supervised, befriended and been around, above anything else, have been the "it" factor in their careers thus far. They talked about what they would change if they could go back, their toughest moments and their favorite foods (Thai food is a common favorite). They all agreed that there's no greater professional honor than being group commanders in the area of responsibility. In the end, they answered what they all called "deep" questions. And this is ...

What I've learned

Colonel Kubinec is a maintenance officer who grew up in a small town outside Pittsburg, where his parents and brother still reside. He'd never been on an airplane until he left for the Air Force Academy in 1988. He met his wife there and maintained a dual-military marriage until she decided to leave active duty and join the reserves a year ago - a decision they made so they can hopefully start a family.

-I never really thought about a career in the military until my football coach mentioned the service academies as possibilities. The price tag was right because I was going to have to pay for college. I tried, at first, to go to Annapolis because it was close to home, but my congressman had already given out his nominations. He said he had one left for the Air Force Academy and I thought, "where is THAT?"

- Early on at the Academy, I started to understand the idea of service. I don't think I joined the Air Force for the right reasons, but I like to think I've stayed for the right ones.
n The number of Fallen Warrior ceremonies we do here hits home and brings the war into focus. To see the sheer number of America's treasures who don't make it home is tough and makes you redouble your efforts to do your job well.

- I agree with Napoleon that a leader is a dealer in hope.

- I became a maintenance officer because of a chief master sergeant. He kept me straight and if I was doing something he didn't like, he would tell me. I've had amazing chiefs who took the time to share wisdom and help me grow as a lieutenant, captain, squadron commander ... I owe a lot to chiefs.

- I think there's something important that people forget - mentorship is not about formal relationships. In fact, I think informal relationships are much more effective than anything formal.

- Talking to Airmen on the flightline is motivating. The other day, it was HOT. I talked to someone from the Wisconsin Air National Guard. Her hair was completely red with hydraulic fluid, but she had an unbelievable attitude. Very positive. I always walk away from those encounters much more lifted up for having talked with them than they are for having talked to me.

- I've never been a big fan of administering discipline. It's not fun and never should be fun. It's a great responsibility as a commander to balance justice with mercy.

- This summer, I talked to some Academy cadets and I shared a few things with them: I wish I hadn't taken myself so seriously. Humility is a key leadership trait. I wish I'd made it less about work and more about family. Think critically, not cynically. Do not be afraid to demand excellence ... people want to be held to a high standard. I wish I'd learned to communicate better, sooner.

- My leadership philosophy is "Lead from the head and heart with humility." I learned this from my parents. Their personalities shaped me. They both sent me books about leadership when I took command of my squadron. The inscriptions were perfect: Dad, the analytical and logical one, said "Use your head." Mom, the passionate and compassionate one, said, "Use your heart." The humility part was modeled by some amazing bosses throughout my career.

Colonel Lefebvre, who is in hospital administration, moved around a lot while she was growing up, but spent most of her formative years outside Philadelphia - a place she still calls home. She met her husband, a Canadian, on her last deployment in Zagreb, Croatia. As they faced separation forced not only by both being active duty, but by being in the service of two different nations, he decided to retire. They've been married 13 years.

- My favorite childhood memory is of going to my grandparents' cottage in the Pennsylvania Allegheny Mountains. We'd sometimes spend two or three weeks, sometimes the whole summer. There was no TV, only an AM radio. We had fun, playing all day, looking for crayfish in the creek, hiking, playing kick the can. We didn't have a bedtime, so it was great. 

- I really decided to join the Air Force while I was an undergrad at Auburn. I knew some guys in a Navy ROTC program, so I started looking into it. I wanted to go into healthcare and I've always had an affinity for the military, as well as a desire to serve my country. When I finally applied for graduate school, I was accepted to both the Air Force and the Navy, but am thankful that I chose the Air Force.

- When I joined, I knew from the first day that I loved it and it was the absolute right choice. 

- My first base was Little Rock Air Force Base, Ark. When I found out I was going there, I cried. I wanted to go to either the east or west coast or overseas, but it was the perfect place for me. I had many civilian, enlisted and officer mentors that positively shaped my future as well as I was afforded many opportunities early in my career.

- I was a squadron section commander when a staff sergeant who worked in our pharmacy had a vehicle accident and ended up on life support. I had to call his parents, tell them what happened and then meet them at the hospital where they decided to take him off life support. It was very difficult for everyone.

- On the job, I'm pretty focused and push people pretty hard. At home, I'm more laid back. But, I'm never idle in either place. My husband always tells me to sit still on Skype!
- I have a group of 92 mighty medics to serve 11,500 people. They amaze me. They're wonderful and they give me energy.

- I find it disappointing when Airmen and civilians with great aptitude and capability choose not to exercise it.

- The only disappointment about my job here is that as a medic, you only get to be a group commander once and this job is only a year. I love it, though. To be able to command in the AOR is absolutely the ultimate. I wouldn't change it; I'd just change the rules.

- My spelling is horrible; Microsoft Word has been my downfall.

- When I finally retire, we're planning to travel six months out of the year. We've been saving Australia, so that will probably be first. I'd like to teach part time, play golf, enjoy life and have a nice house with a beautiful view. I envision each morning starting with a strong cup of coffee, relaxing and enjoying the view.

Colonel Auch grew up in Fergus Falls, Minn., and later moved to nearby Ada, where his graduating high school class was 32 students. His father was an Air Force recruiter and as the youngest and only one of four kids to join the service, he joked he had to save his father's honor by joining the Air Force. He joined ROTC at Moorhead State University as a junior and was later commissioned as a personnel officer in 1989. 

- As a child, I loved getting up at sunrise, spending the whole day with friends and coming home at sunset. I think that was a valuable part of my childhood that I wish my kids could have. We now live near Washington, D.C., and we worry about the kids walking three blocks to school.

- I have a different philosophy on mentorship. I tend to think that everyone is my mentor. And I think the onus of the relationship falls to the mentee to seek out qualities and adopt what works for them. I don't believe a mentor has to be a superior, in the same career field or even in the Air Force.

- I don't think I'm different at home and on the job. I do know I'm more of an introvert at home. On the job, I'm in a leadership position and I can't be quiet. But off the job, I'm comfortable in that element to sit back in the quiet follower role.

- My greatest hope is that I raise my children to be productive members of society. I hope I've done my part as a parent.

- I love this job, because this job, this place, is all about the mission. When I wake up each morning, I don't need to be motivated - the mission motivates me. 

- The worst part of THIS job is that my wife misses out on the opportunity to be a part of our team.

- I have three kids - 18, 16, 11 - and my oldest, our only girl, just left for college. My wife is having a rough time with that absence from the house too.

n I don't really listen to music. I don't even own an iPod and I haven't turned on the radio in my truck once since I arrived. But, my daughter is a performer in musical theater, my older son plays lead guitar in a band, and my youngest son plays violin and bass guitar. So my interest in music is focused through them.

- My wife is 100% behind me in my career. She enjoys it as much as I do and is as much an Airman as I am.

- Besides my family, I miss my dogs the most. I see our defenders' military working dogs and just want to go play with them, but I know that would be a big mistake.

- There's not enough time in the day here. Last week, my sister told me that my mom and dad get up each morning and turn on the computer looking for an e-mail from me. So now, I try to send them a quick note and I succeed probably one out of every three days.

- When I found out I was coming here for a one-year tour, it stung a little because our son is going to be a junior this year. Our expectation was to go somewhere for his last two years, now we'll have to move before his senior year. We are a resilient Air Force family and now I couldn't imagine a better place to command.

Colonel Kulas is a pilot who grew up in Stevens Point, Wis. He spent his youth going camping with his family and loved it. His interest in joining the military started when he was in his youth as he read biographies about generals. His neighbor's dad was in the Army during Vietnam, so he used to talk to him about service. He's always wanted to fly, so his alma mater, the Air Force Academy, seemed like the most natural fit. 

- During my years at the Air Force Academy, I was just trying to survive. I went with the premise of going to pilot training and fulfilling that eight-year commitment. I also wanted to be able to get out when I wanted to, meaning being financially able to make that decision.

- My favorite assignment was as an Olmsted Scholar in Prague, Czech Republic. I spent two years there going to university and was expected to travel during the school breaks. I went to St. Petersburg, Russia, Lyon, France, and Stockholm, Sweden, the Balkans and many more places ...

- When I was a squadron commander at Incirlik, one of my guys' wife went off base for elective surgery suffered complications. I spent several days with him as her condition deteriorated and then she passed away. It was tough to watch as he told their four children that their mom was never coming home again. We did a humanitarian PCS for him so we loaded the family into the passenger seats on the rotator and his wife in the cargo hold in a transfer case. That's no way to leave a base. 

- I don't know if I'm different at home and at work. Home is home and work is work.

- I hope there's a bright future for my kids. They don't have to be rich or famous - just good people.

- I love getting out and flying - contributing to the mission is always a good job. Also, getting out and talking to Airmen is invigorating, and recognizing star performers is awesome. 

- Sitting at a desk drives me nuts. I hate being bogged down by e-mail.

- I have three sons (12, 10 and 7) and the oldest is a mini-me. I don't know if they'll follow my footsteps in the Air Force, but my oldest tells me he wants to fly fast jets. My middle son hates the military because it takes dad away from him. The youngest equates flying with me going to Germany to bring back Kinder eggs, so he kind of
likes it.

- I'm completely humbled to be a group commander in a combat wing in the largest, most powerful combat group in the world today.

- I guess I'm in the position I'm in today because somewhere, someone trusts me ...
- My wife and I have been married for 15 years and have moved nine times. We will retire where my wife wants to go.

- You've got to be a follower before you can be a leader. I've picked up leadership traits from anyone and everyone along the way. My very first squadron commander was very, very good. Another one stood out as how not to be.

- My wife is proud of what I've accomplished and doesn't seem to mind all the moving very much. The kids have all adapted well, but at some point, it's going to get tough for them.

- I love Thai food. I love good food. One of the best things about the Olmsted program was travelling and finding all the good food all over Europe.

- I'm not very good at being the boisterous, back-slapping, rah-rah kind of guy, but I'm pretty good at ducking questions for this interview.